Thursday, July 16, 2009

Sue Scheff: Teen Internet Addiction - Wrapped in the Web



Introduction


In today’s society, the Internet has made its way into almost every American home. It is a well-known fact that the web is a valuable asset for research and learning. Unfortunately, it can also be a very dangerous place for teens. With social networking sites like Myspace and Friendster, chat rooms, instant messaging, and online role-playing video games, our children are at access to almost anyone. Sue Scheff, along with Parent’s Universal Resource Experts™, is tackling the dangers of the web.

Keeping tabs on our teens’ online habits doesn’t just keep them safe from online predators. More and more parents are becoming wary of the excessive hours their teens spend surfing the web, withdrawing from family, friends and activities they used to enjoy. Internet Addiction is a devastating problem facing far too many teens and their families. While medical professionals have done limited research on the topic, more and more are recognizing this destructive behavior and even more, the potential mental effects it can have.

Though the web is a great place for learning and can be safe for keeping in touch, it is important that families understand the potential risks and dangers to find a healthy balance between real and virtual life.

The Basics: The Dangers of Teen Internet Addiction
It’s clear that, for teenagers, spending too much time online can really deter social and educational development. The Internet world is such that there is always something new to do and to distract one from one’s responsibilities. We all do it- take ten minutes here or there to explore our favorite gossip or sports site. There is nothing wrong with using the Internet as a tool for research, news, and even entertainment. After all, the World Wide Web is the world’s most accurate, up to date resource for almost any type of information.

But as the Internet evolves and becomes more tailored to the individual, it grows increasingly easier to develop a dependency on it. This is especially true for teens- a group that tends to be susceptible to flashy graphics and easily enticed by the popularity of social networks. In a sense, the Internet is the new video game or TV show. It used to be that adolescents would sit in front of the TV for hours on end operating a remote, shooting people and racing cars. Now they surf the web. Teens are impressionable and can at times be improperly equipped to handle certain situations with a degree of reason and rationality. And although they may have good intentions, they might be at risk of coming across something inappropriate and even dangerous.

Sexual Predators
We’ve all heard the stories about children entering chat rooms who end up talking to someone older than them who may be looking for something more than merely a chat. These tales may sound far-fetched, or to some, even mundane, because of the publicity they’ve received, but as a parent it would be rather foolish to dismiss them as hearsay or as something that could never actually happen to your child. The fact is, these accounts of sexual predation are all too true and have caused some families a great deal of strain and fear. Even pre-adolescents have been known to join chat rooms. The reality is that there is no real way of knowing who might be in one at any given time. An even scarier thought is that these forums are often sexual predators’ main source of contact with young children. In fact, the popular TV show, [To Catch a Predator (http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/10912603/)], employs someone to pose as a teen and entice these sex offenders. The show profiles the interactions between them all the way up until the actual meeting. Some of the situations portrayed are horrifying. If you’re the parent of a teen or pre-teen, make sure to monitor Internet activity with regards to chat rooms and educate your child on the potential dangers they present.

Sensitive Subject Matter
Human curiosity is perhaps at its peak during one’s teenage years. That curiosity is what aids teens in the growth and development process. It’s necessary for survival as an adolescent and can provide for some great discoveries and maturation. However, teen curiosity can also potentially lead a person into some questionable situations, and the Internet is a prime medium through which to quell one’s inquisitiveness. Let’s face it- teenagers are anxious to be knowledgeable about topics such as sex, drugs, and other dangerous subject matter.

Talking to your teen about these sensitive subjects before he or she has a chance to search online can be a great way to allay his or her need to surf the web for more information. The Internet might be an excellent tool for presenting interesting data, but it can also grossly misrepresent certain issues. If a teenager wants to learn about sex or drugs via the web, he or she might decide to do a search containing the words “sex” or, perhaps “marijuana.” The results your child might find may not necessarily be the type of educational, instructive material you’d hope they would receive. The Internet may be savvy, but one thing it’s not capable of doing is knowing who is using it at any given time and how to customize its settings. Talk to your children about subjects you feel are important before they have the chance to find out themselves. You never know what they might come across.

Limited Social Growth
There is no better time to experience new things and meet new people than during one’s teenage years. Getting outside, going to social gatherings, and just having a good time with friends are among some of the most productive and satisfying activities in which teenagers can engage. While the Internet can provide a degree of social interaction, online networks and connections cannot replace the benefits of in-person contact. Teen Internet Addiction is dangerous because it limits a person’s options when it comes to communication. Much of learning and growing as a teen comes from the lessons one learns through friendships, fights, disagreements, trends, popularity, etc.

The Internet has made it all too easy for teens to recoil from the pressures of adolescence and remain indoors. The lure of the web can often make it seem as though social networks and online gaming are acceptable substitutes for real life. Teens can find acceptance in chat rooms and message boards, while at school they might be complete outcasts. It’s easy for teenagers to rebuff the idea of interacting with their peers and risking rejection when the Internet can provide for a seemingly relaxed environment. Children need to know that Internet addiction and reliance on online forums will only stunt social growth and make life much more difficult in the future.

Sedentary Lifestyle
Internet dependency also inherently promotes a lifestyle that is not conducive to exercise and physical activity. Many teens tend to become so enthralled in games or chats that peeling them away from the computer can prove to be an ominous task. The entertainment the Internet can provide often trumps the option to leave the house and get exercise. Parents should encourage their teens to use the Internet for school projects and some degree of entertainment, but they should also limit the time that they are allowed to spend on the computer. Begin supporting your child’s involvement in sports teams at an early age and make outside activities fun and interesting. The earlier a child is introduced to the mental and physical benefits of outside activity, the more likely he or she is to avoid inside amusements such as the Internet, TV, and video games.

Nowadays it seems our whole lives can be conducted via the Internet. We can order, purchase, and have groceries delivered all with the click of a few buttons. We can play games, talk to people, find dates, and even attend AA meetings online. The Internet may have made our lives and their day-to-day processes exponentially easier to accomplish, but by the same token it has also increased our dependence on the advantages it can provide. The convenience it creates has been known to cause some people to recoil from outside situations, opting to conduct as much business as possible from home. We must be careful of this trend, especially with teenagers, for whom positive (and negative) social interaction help to form valuable personality and wisdom.

Learn more at my website on this topic – click here

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Sue Scheff: Teen Suicide


Suicide is the third most common cause of death amongst adolescents between 15-24 years of age, and the sixth most common cause of death amongst 5-14 year olds. It is estimated that over half of all teens suffering from depression will attempt suicide at least once, and of those teens, roughly seven percent will succeed on the first try.


Teenagers are especially vulnerable to the threat of suicide, because in addition to increased stress from school, work and peers, teens are also dealing with hormonal fluctuations that can complicate even the most normal situations.

Because of these social and personal changes, teens are also at higher risk for depression, which can also increase feelings of despair and the desire to commit suicide. In fact, according to a study by the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) almost all people who commit suicide suffer from a diagnosable mental disorder or substance abuse disorder.


Often, teens feel as though they have no other way out of their problems, and may not realize that suicidal thoughts and feelings can be treated. Unfortunately, due to the often volatile relationship between teens and their parents, teens may not be as forthcoming about suicidal feelings as parents would hope. The good news is there are many signs parents can watch for in their teen without necessarily needing their teen to open up to them.


At some point in most teens’ lives, they will experience periods of sadness, worry and/or despair. While it is completely normal for a healthy person to have these types of responses to pain resulting from loss, dismissal, or disillusionment, those with serious (often undiagnosed) mental illnesses often experience much more drastic reactions. Many times these severe reactions will leave the teen in despair, and they may feel that there is no end in sight to their suffering. It is at this point that the teen may lose hope, and with the absence of hope comes more depression and the feeling that suicide is the only solution. It isn’t.


Teen girls are statistically twice as likely as their male counterparts to attempt suicide. They tend to turn to drugs (overdosing) or to cut themselves, while boys are traditionally more successful in their suicide attempts because they utilize more lethal methods such as guns and hanging. This method preference makes boys almost four times more successful in committing suicide.


Studies have borne out that suicide rates rise considerably when teens can access firearms in their home. In fact, nearly 60% of suicides committed in the United States that result in immediate death are accomplished with a gun. This is one crucial reason that any gun kept in a home with teens, even if that teen does not display any outward signs of depression, be stored in a locked compartment away from any ammunition.


In fact, the ammunition should be stored in a locked compartment as well, and the keys to both the gun and ammunition compartments should be kept in a different area from where normal, everyday keys are kept. Remember to always keep firearms, ammunition, and the keys to the locks containing them, away from kids.


Unfortunately, teen suicide is not a rare event. In the United States, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) estimates that suicide is the third leading cause of death for people between the ages of 15 and 24. This disturbing trend is affecting younger children as well, with suicide rates experiencing dramatic increases in the under-15 age group from 1980 to 1996. Suicide attempts are even more prevalent, though it is difficult to track the exact rates.
Learn more

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Sue Scheff: Stop Medicine Abuse


Five moms have continued their mission to Stop Medicine Abuse amongst teens and kids today.

First launched in May 2007, the Five Moms Campaign has reached over 24 million parents with these basic messages to parents about preventing teen cough medicine abuse.


When the campaign launched, teen cough medicine abuse was on the increase. Now, nationwide statistics point to a slight decrease. That’s great news, but more work has to be done to eliminate this type of substance abuse behavior among teens.

CHPA brought together five moms—a pediatric nurse practitioner, an accountant, a D.A.R.E. officer, an educator, and an author—from different backgrounds and from all over the country to encourage parents to get involved in stopping cough medicine abuse. And now Five Moms is part of the StopMedicineAbuse.org effort.


Protect Your Teens
Posted by Five Mom, Blaise Brooks


Teenagers’ lives are filled with tough decisions, handling outside pressures, and figuring out what type of person to become. While it is impossible to make all the right decisions for your teens and keep them clear of any hardships, as a parent you can help steer them in the right direction including where substance abuse is concerned, include over-the-counter (OTC) cough medicine abuse. The most important thing is to embrace your responsibility as the educator and parent and to talk to your teen in an open way.


Don’t turn a blind eye.


No one wants to believe that their kids would ever abuse any drug, let alone OTC medicine. But the truth is teens are abusing medicine and every parent needs to be aware and keep his or her eyes open to the signs of abuse, both in the home and in the community. If you ever have a question, you can check this list of the signs of abuse from the Stop Medicine Abuse web site.

Talk to your teen.


A conversation about drug abuse is never an easy one, but it’s necessary. And it’s crucial to keep having the conversation and keep those lines of communication going. The fact of the matter is that teens who learn a lot about drugs in the home are half as likely to abuse. One way you can make it easier is by letting the issue speak for itself: Take a look at DXMstories.com, where you and your teens can see the negative effects of cough medicine abuse on the lives of real teens through their own personal testimonials. You also can check out timetotalk.org from the Partnership for a Drug-Free America for tips about how to talk with teens about substance abuse.


Take responsibility for your medicine cabinet


You need to trust your teen, but you still should take steps to safeguard your medicine cabinet. Know what medicines you have and how much medication is in each bottle or package, and be sure to tell your teens what you’re doing and why. This may even be the perfect opportunity for you discuss medicine abuse.


By taking action to protect your teens from OTC medicine abuse and sharing this information with other parents, you not only protect the health and safety of your own teens, but also are taking a step towards protecting other teens in your community. Don’t forget to join us on the Stop Medicine Abuse Fan page on Facebook to discuss how you and your community can protect teens from medicine abuse.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Sue Scheff: Love Our Children USA


Love Our Children USA is the national nonprofit leader that honors, respects and protects children. Its mission is to break the cycle of violence against children. Love Our Children USA has become ‘the go-to’ prevention organization for all forms of violence and neglect against children in the U.S. Working to eliminate behaviors that keep children from reaching their potential, it redefines parenting and creates kid success by promoting prevention strategies and positive changes in parenting and family attitudes and behaviors through public education. Empowering and supporting children, teens, parents and families through information, resources, advocacy, and online youth mentoring, and much more.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Sue Scheff: Parent Alert: Teens and Porn


Porn has gone interactive–and your kids are at risk. From “sexting” to video chats, how to fight back.



Photo-Illustration By Kevin Irby


My seven-year-old, Henry, can’t spell. Yet there’s one word he can spell perfectly. That word is boob. I discovered this last week when I gave him my iPhone to noodle around with. He told me he was playing on Disney’s Club Penguin, but when I turned on the phone later, the page that popped up was a porn site. When I confronted him, he looked at me very seriously and said, “Well, Mom, I’m extremely interested in the human body.”

This makes me laugh because he is seven. What’s not at all funny is what this incident says about the future. If the ability to spell one palindrome at his age can get him to one of the most explicit sites imaginable, how blasé will he be about porn by the time he’s a teenager? And how much of a leap is it to imagine my son getting into the latest teenage craze, so-called sexting—nude photos taken by teens and posted or sent to others over the Internet or cell phone? How long before he turns to me—as a friend’s 15-year-old did to her mother recently—and says, “Mom, it’s no big deal”?

Monday, May 4, 2009

Teens and Summer Jobs 2009


A Guide for Teens: How to Find a Summer or Part-Time Job


by Randall S. Hansen, Ph.D.


Even if summer vacation is still a few months away for most teens, now is the time to plan and lay a foundation for landing that cool summer job you really want.


Some caveats: This article is really geared to older high school and college teens, with a focus on summer jobs, not internships. For younger teens (under 15), check out another article I wrote, Job Ideas for Teens 15 and Younger: Beyond Babysitting. For college students looking for internship tips, we’re working on such an article, but for now, please visit: Quintessential Careers: College Internship Resources.


The Action Plan for Teens Wanting a Summer JobThe first step you need to do is decide on the summer job you want or need -– in terms of the type of job, the location, the hours, the pay. You may not be able to find a job that meets all your needs, but given the current employment situation you should strive to find one that meets as many as possible.


The second step you need to do is complete a self-analysis. What do you have to offer an employer? What kind of skills do you have? What kind of other work have you done -– paid or volunteer? What have you learned at school that might be useful in your ideal summer job?
The third step you need to do is develop a resume. You will put forth a very professional image if you present a professional-looking resume to potential employers. You’ll want to visit Quintessential Careers: Resume Resources. You’ll also need to learn about cover letters, so plan on visiting Quintessential Careers: Cover Letter Resources.


The fourth step you need to do is use all your available resources to land that ideal summer job. Talk with your parents and older family members, your friends’ parents, your teachers, and any other adults you know and ask them if they have any contacts at your ideal job’s company. Give them copies of your resume. We call this step networking, and it will give you the highest chances of landing your ideal job.


The fifth step is hitting the pavement, reading the newspaper want ads, and/or surfing the Web. If you don’t get any job leads from the fourth step, you have to take action!


The sixth step is applying for the jobs that interest you. This step is where you again use your resume. Make sure you are familiar with job applications and have all the information you need to complete them.


The seventh step is interviewing for the jobs. Make sure you know something about the company; develop answers to common interview questions; think of a few questions you could ask; practice, practice, practice with a family member of friend; dress conservatively for the interview. You can read these interviewing tips in more detail — and find lots more — by visiting Quintessential Careers: Interviewing Resources.


Where Teens can Find Summer JobsThere are any number of places where you can look for a good summer job:


Local merchants: local stores often need good help – and not just in the summer.


Small businesses: most towns have a number of small business offices – and your family or friends probably know several owners or office managers.


Corporate offices: many have established summer jobs and internship programs, but often these are the most competitive.


Stores at the mall: have a favorite store you like to shop at in the mall? Maybe now is the time to get a job there –- just be careful not to spend all your earnings buying their products.


Hotels and resorts: summer is the busy season for most hotels and resorts.


Tourist attractions: even if you don’t live in Florida or California, most states have tourist attractions that especially need help during the busy tourism season.


Golf & Tennis clubs: as the weather improves, these clubs are usually looking for part-time help.
Grocery stores: maybe not the most exciting jobs, but probably the most convenient -– and not just for summer.


Fast food and restaurants: local restaurants always need good help -– and while not the most glamorous, it’s still a job.


Parks and recreation departments: city, state, and national parks and recreation departments often develop special summer programs, and thus have job opportunities.


Local government summer job programs: often various government agencies sponsor different kinds of summer youth work programs.


Summer camps: okay, you went to camp as a kid – now you can go back as a counselor and get paid while being at camp.


Working for yourself: there are all sorts of jobs/businesses you could develop for yourself in your neighborhood –- Check out my article, Job Ideas for Teens 15 and Younger: Beyond Babysitting.
The Web: especially if you want to work outside your neighborhood, or even your state, the Web is the place for you to explore all sorts of summer job opportunities -– so go visit Quintessential Careers: Summer Job Websites.


What do Employers Look for in TeensEmployers want motivated teens who are going to arrive to work on time, have a positive attitude, work hard, work well with others, show leadership qualities, work their full shift, and do the best job they can. You need to show your employer that you are a good investment, both for the current position, as well as for any potential future positions.


Final Words of AdviceJobs are jobs. You are going to have to work, no matter how “cool” the job or company, so be prepared for some days to not be as great as others. The keys to remember are that you are earning money, you are gaining experience, and you are making good contacts (and references)!

Questions about some of the terminology used in this article? Get more information (definitions and links) on key college, career, and job-search terms by going to our Job-Seeker’s Glossary of Job-Hunting Terms.


Dr. Randall S. Hansen is founder of Quintessential Careers, one of the oldest and most comprehensive career development sites on the Web, as well CEO of EmpoweringSites.com. He is also founder of MyCollegeSuccessStory.com and EnhanceMyVocabulary.com. He is publisher of Quintessential Careers Press, including the Quintessential Careers electronic newsletter, QuintZine. Dr. Hansen is also a published author, with several books, chapters in books, and hundreds of articles. He’s often quoted in the media and conducts empowering workshops around the country. Finally, Dr. Hansen is also an educator, having taught at the college level for more than 15 years. Visit his personal Website or reach him by email at randall(at)quintcareers.com.

Friday, April 24, 2009

Sue Scheff: Preventing Violence and Teens


It comes to a point where you are almost afraid to turn on the news. Kids with guns, teens shooting teens, threats, bullying and more - it is time for parents to take the time and learn more. Talk to your kids - open those lines of communication. Raising kids today has become more challenging than ever. I hear from parents almost on a daily basis and I am stunned at what these kids are learning and doing at such a young age.



Can Students Prevent Violence by Telling?


“He was saying ‘I’m gonna kill people,’ everyone took it as a joke. I can’t say that I would take it any differently.”


– Joanna, 15, talking about the school shooting in Santee, California


A student who seems strange, a comment that sounds frightening … how can students tell who’s serious and who isn’t, what’s a joke and what’s a real threat?


The problem is students say those kinds of ‘jokes’ are made all the time.


“I’ve had friends who were just like, ‘man I just want to kill that teacher’ or ‘I just hate it here and want to blow up the school,’” says Tara-Lynn, a high school junior, “I’ve probably said things like that myself.”


“I mean I hear people say that all the time. I don’t take it seriously,” adds Joanna, a freshman.
When should students take it seriously? They’re in a bind. If they tell on someone, they’re called a rat or a snitch. If they don’t tell, someone could die or be injured. Always in the back of their mind, what if they tell on someone… and they’re wrong?


“How do you know you’re not gonna just end up crying ‘wolf’ all the time, every time a kid makes a threat,” says Cliff, a junior.


How should kids evaluate a threat? Experts say first, kids should follow their instincts. If something another student says doesn’t feel right, even just a little bit, it probably isn’t.
“Either afraid, or guilty, or this is just going against my values, it doesn’t feel right,” says psychologist Dr. Wendy Blumenthal.


Then find an adult you trust. Someone you can trust to protect your anonymity. Someone you can trust not to panic when you tell them you’re worried.


Maybe that’s your parents, but it could also be a school counselor, a minister from your church or a coach.


Because if a disaster happens and you stay silent about what you heard, just think how that would make you feel.


“Because if we take everything for granted,” says Crystal, a junior, “this (the school shooting in California) is what can happen.”

Tips for Parents


Police have been able to prevent several ‘Columbine-like’ massacres at US schools recently–thanks to tips from students. Students notified school officials after learning that other students planned to carry out violent acts. And while kids are more willing to report threats of violence after Columbine, experts say parents should explain to their children that there is a difference between ‘telling’ and ‘tattling.’


According to the National Education Association (NEA):


Children ‘tattle’ to get their own way or to get someone else in trouble.


Children should be encouraged to ‘tell’ an adult when someone is in danger of getting hurt.
Some schools have started anonymous hotlines so that parents or children can provide information that could alert authorities to potential problems.


According to the American Psychological Association one in 12 high schoolers is threatened or injured with a weapon each year. To reduce that risk, the APA lists several ‘warning signs’ that kids need to recognize in other students, indications that violence is a “serious possibility”:


Loss of temper on a daily basis
Frequent physical fighting
Significant vandalism or property damage
Increase in use of drugs or alcohol
Increase in risk-taking behavior
Detailed plans to commit acts of violence
Announcing threats or plans for hurting others
Enjoying hurting animals
Carrying a weapon


Once students recognize a warning sign, the APA says there are things they can do. Hoping that someone else will deal with the problem is “the easy way out.” The advice for students:


Above all, be safe. Don’t spend time alone with people who show warning signs.


Tell someone you trust and respect about your concerns and ask for help (a family member, guidance counselor, teacher, school psychologist, coach, clergy, or friend).


If you are worried about becoming a victim of violence, get someone to protect you. Do not resort to violence or use a weapon to protect yourself.


The key to preventing violent behavior, according to the APA, is asking an experienced professional for help. The important thing to remember is, don’t go it alone.

References
National Education Association
American Psychological Association

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Sue Scheff: Teens and Sexting


Today’s parents seem to constantly have to keep up with the new concerns with teens today. “Sexting” is a growing and disturbing issue with many parents of teenagers today. What these kids are not realizing is what goes online, stays online and spreads like a virus. Teens today don’t think about college admissions or potential employers 2-4 years from now. In an instant, a not so flattering photo can arrive in thousands of mailboxes! That is, email boxes. Take the time to talk to your kids about the ramifications this can potentially have on their future.




Sex easily and quickly integrated itself into the digital age; and now the teen trend of “sexting” — where a user sends sexually explicit images or messages via text on a cell phone — has parents struggling for a way to address the situation.


“We’re seeing 14, 15 and 16-year-olds and up are very commonly sharing naked pictures or sexual pictures of themselves,” said Internet safety expert Parry Aftab, of Wired Safety. “We’re talking about kids who are too young to wear bras who are posing in them, and then topless and then actually engaged in sex or even in masturbation. So we are seeing a lot of kids who are sexually active.”


There’s nothing coy about this 21st century amorous pursuit. Children as young as 12, who aren’t sexually active, are sending explicit, provocative and even pornographic images to their peers.



Aftab will answer questions live on “GMA” Thursday.
Click here for more Internet safety tips from Parry Aftab.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Sue Scheff: Can Teen Acne Effect Your Child?


By Johana Curtis (Licensed Skin Care Professional)


Teenage Acne Psychological Effects Can Be Severe

As a group that deals with troubled teens on a daily basis, we can see how particular issues unique to teenagers can exacerbate the already difficult time some kids have. Teenage acne psychological effects can be severe enough to cause depression and lower self esteem. Add this to all the other issues commonly found with difficult teens and the result can be problematic. However, there is a way to alleviate the issues surrounding acne in teenagers. Removing this issue can do wonders with a teenager’s self esteem and make it easier to relate to them, especially if they have other psychological issues.

In order to deal with the problem it is important to have some information on teenage acne. The first thing you should know about it is how it occurs. Once there is an understanding of what causes acne then it is easier to find ways to cure it. Teenage acne tips can help ensure the problem is lessened to an extent that it no longer affects the child adversely. Having healthy, clear skin can boost a teenager’s self confidence. Not being self conscious about their appearance will make a teen easier to help when they have problems resulting from other factors in their life.

So, why does acne occur in the first place? Many theories have been bandied about throughout the ages. Most of them, however, are myths and are actually not directly responsible for causing teenage acne. Clothing that is worn, working out excessively and certain types of food are not the root cause of acne. All of those issues may at times make acne worse than it normally would be but it is not the cause of the problem. The cause is simply a hormonal imbalance. Teenagers go through significant hormonal changes when they hit puberty as it is. An imbalance will bring about acne that can sometimes be severe enough to affect a teen’s appearance and self esteem.

If hormonal changes are the cause of acne, is there anything that can be done about it? Yes, there is. There are two basic ways acne should be treated in order to ensure a long term, positive effect. First, the skin should be treated. This is typically done via over the counter topical products. Teenagers should get into the habit of taking care of their skin. Purchasing scrubs, cleansers and lotions will suffice to begin a proper skin care regimen that should be used daily.

The purpose of the topical treatments is twofold. First, the teenager gets into a healthy habit of maintaining proper skin care that will last throughout their life. Also, acne that already exists will be cured more quickly and the skin will have a fresh, clean appearance in no time at all. The teenager will be pleased with the results and will have a better outlook about their appearance.

But, topical treatments are not the sole solution that should be explored. There should also be treatment for the root cause of acne, the hormones. In order to treat the hormonal imbalance it is necessary to use supplements. This will naturally restore the hormones to the proper balance, alleviating the acne problem and will prevent it from returning. There are many natural supplements available from health food stores and vitamin shops.

However, there are a few products on the market designed specifically to resolve the problem of teenage acne and include both topical creams and supplements. These products treat the problem from the inside out and are convenient to use because everything is sold in one package. These all inclusive products can be found in health food stores, in the skin care aisles of stores and are also available online. Most supplements are taken once or twice per day and the skin cleansers and creams are also used once or twice per day. This is convenient for the teen to use and makes them less prone to forget to use it.

A hormonal imbalance is the primary cause of teenage acne. Other factors may exacerbate the issue but that is where the topical cleansers come into play. The dietary supplements will treat the root cause of the acne, the hormonal imbalance. With proper treatment, a teenager can feel more confident about facing the other difficulties that occur with teens. Unfortunately, the teenage years can be difficult and sometimes more severe problems can occur.

A teenager who suffers from acne can exhibit signs of depression and withdraw from peers and adults alike. Curing acne can not remove all the difficulties teenagers must face on a daily basis but it can eliminate one of the issues that cause severe emotional problems and self esteem issues. If you understand how acne occurs and how to treat it, curing acne in a teen can be easier than it may seem.

Friday, April 3, 2009

Sue Scheff: Teens and the Choking Game


The Choking Game - a teen thing? What is the Choking Game? It is definitely not a game any parent want to learn about the hard way. Learn more now about this horrific game through G.A.S.P. (Games Adolescents Shouldn’t Play).


I received an email from a mother that almost lost her son to this game. She is now part of an advocacy group to help inform and educate others about this choking game. She understands she almost lost her son, as a matter of fact, she thought she had. Miraculously, her son survived after several days in a coma following this incident. As a parent advocate, I always encourage others to share their stories, mistakes, experiences etc in an effort to help others. This is one of the many parents that is hoping you will learn from her firsthand experiences.


Source: G.A.S.P.


It’s not a game at all—just an act of suffocating on purpose.


Adolescents cut off the flow of blood to the brain, in exchange for a few seconds of feeling lightheaded. Some strangle themselves with a belt, a rope or their bare hands; others push on their chest or hyperventilate.


When they release the pressure, blood that was blocked up floods the brain all at once. This sets off a warm and fuzzy feeling, which is just the brain dying, thousands of cells at a time.


Personal Note from the Mother:


Holding my son, as he took his first breath of life, for the second time took my breath away. He got a second chance to make a better choice. What I witnessed defies logic and reason. I made a choice to quit trying to understand, and instead pour my passionate gratitude for his life into advocacy work - to be a ripple in the wave of some much needed change. Stopping this behavior only starts with awareness. Ed4Ed is a program of education for educators. I consider all who possess knowledge, all upon acquiring it who connect with youth, care for and/or guide them, are then in turn ambassadors of that truth – incumbent educators.


When I am personally presenting from the materials of the program, I conclude by passing that torch to those with whom I speak. This deadly activity, masquerading as a “game” is an international problem, with a simple solution, educate! Give our kids the facts and they’ll make a better choice. Once he became aware of what had happened, Levi just shook his head and said “I didn’t know, Mom. People pass out all the time. I didn’t know.” Not one boy in the 500 that attended his boarding school knew the facts. They studied physics, science, biology and anatomy. None thought of it as anything more than a parlor trick, something new to try, not drugs, not alcohol – just a game. When we know better, we do better. When they know better, they will too.


Learn More:
http://www.adobe.com/products/reader * Version 9*Videos - are created in an MPEG-4 Movie FormatQuick Time - Is a compatible free downloadable software, - Current Version 7.6http://www.apple.com/quicktime/download

Monday, March 23, 2009

Sue Scheff: Parent Choices for Schools and Programs


Parent Choices

Local Therapy:


Local therapy is a good place to start with children that struggling at home and school. To locate a local therapist, it is beneficial to contact your insurance company for a list of adolescent therapists in your area. If you don’t have insurance when calling therapists, ask them if they accept sliding scales according to your income. Check your yellow pages for local Mental Health Services in your area or ask your Pediatrician or Family Doctor for a referral.

Military Schools and Academies:

Military Schools have been around for over a hundred years. Many parents are under the misconception that Military Schools are for at risk children. Military Schools are a privilege and honor to attend and be accepted into. Your child must have some desire to attend a Military School. Many children believe Military Schools are for bad kids, however if they visit a campus they may realize it is an opportunity for them. Many parents start with a Military Summer program to determine if their child is a candidate for Military School.

Military Schools usually do not offer therapy, unless contracted on the outside of the school. They offer structure, positive discipline, self-confidence, small class sizes and excellent academics. Military Schools can build a student’s self-esteem; motivate them to benefit their future both socially and academically.

Traditional Boarding Schools:

Traditional Boarding Schools are like Military Schools, in which your child will have to want to attend and be accepted into the school. There are many excellent Boarding Schools that offer both academics and special needs for students. Many specialize in specific areas such as fine arts, music, and competitive sports. In most cases, therapy is not offered unless contracted on the outside.

Therapeutic Boarding Schools (TBS):

Therapeutic Boarding Schools offer therapy and academics to students. Usually the student has not done well in a traditional school and is making bad choices that could have an effect on their future. Although many of the students are exceptionally smart, they are not working to their ability. Sometimes peer pressure can lead your child down a destructive path. Removing them from their environment can be beneficial to them to focus on themselves both emotionally and academically.

Christian Boarding Schools:

Christian Boarding Schools and Programs for struggling teens offer therapy and academics. They have a spiritual foundation that can assist a child to better understand Christianity as well as bring them closer to a Higher Power. Many offer Youth Groups and activities that can create life skills for a better future. A program with a Christian setting may enhance a child’s better understanding of the world today.

Residential Treatment Center (RTC):

Residential Treatment Centers, similar to a TBS, offer therapy and academics. However Residential Treatment Centers are for children that require more clinical support. Their issues are more specific with substance abuse, eating disorders, self-mutilators, and other behavioral issues.

Summer Programs:

Summer programs are a great place to start if your child is beginning to make bad choices or losing their motivation. Finding a good summer program that can build self-confidence can be beneficial to student’s prior starting a new school year.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Parents Universal Resource Experts - Sue Scheff - Stop bullying now!


Kids today, both teens and pre-teens, can be extremely mean and cause emotional issues to their target. What can parents do? Read more about how you can help stop bullying.


What Can Adults Do?


Welcome to the Take a Stand. Lend a Hand. Stop Bullying Now! adult pages. As an adult, one of best ways you can help stop or prevent bullying is to be educated about, and sensitive to, the issue. Bullying is NOT a rite of passage - an undesirable, but sometimes unavoidable, reality of growing up. Rather, bullying is a serious public health issue that affects countless young people everyday. Further, research shows that the effects of bullying can last well into adulthood. Whether you are a concerned parent, an educator or school employee, a health and safety professional, or someone else who works with children, there are many things you can do to help.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Sue Scheff: New Book Details Comprehensive Plan To Deal Effectively with Kids with ADHD


March 4, 2009

For Immediate Release
Contact: Michele Robinson
HWM Communications
301-530-1845



New Book Details Comprehensive Plan
To Deal Effectively with Kids with ADHD

School Success for Kids With ADHD, published this month by Prufrock Press, is a new resource that offers parents and teachers the latest information to support the total child at school, at home and in social situations. If parents have only one book to read about ADHD, this is it.

Written by three Washington, D.C. experts in child psychology and education, School Success for Kids With ADHD offers a 12-point plan–a wrap around approach—that includes parents, teachers, physicians and school counselors in supporting the child or teenager with ADHD.

School Success for Kids With ADHD sorts out the current confusion over ADHD medications by providing the latest information about which medications works best. Because 34 percent of Americans now use alternative or complementary medical therapies, the authors include the latest information about diet and stress management.

The book is organized so that no matter where you are as a parent–first diagnosed, veteran or skeptic—you can open the book and find your place. School Success for Kids With ADHD has been described as “one stop” reading about kids with ADHD because all information presented is updated and comprehensive.

The book walks the reader through the steps to develop a comprehensive plan about what services are needed to support a student with ADHD. The book’s authors strongly believe that the more information that parents and educators have, they better equipped they are to make decisions.

Topics covered include recognizing the causes and types of attention deficits and how they appear in the school context, requesting school evaluations and diagnoses, understanding the laws regarding students with special needs, advocating for these students in the school environment, and coaching students with attention deficits to success.

The authors also include a brief overview of research and medical perspectives on attention deficits, strategies used by teachers of children with ADHD, and helpful tools for parents and teachers to employ, such as homework checklists and self-advocacy charts.

School Success for Kids With ADHD is now available at Border’s, your local bookstore
or from Prufrock Press Inc., (800) 998-2208; http://www.prufrock.com/.



About the authors

Stephan M. Silverman, Ph.D., served as a school psychologist for 30 years, specializing in the treatment and instruction of children with attention deficit disorders and learning disabilities. He is the coauthor of the best-selling School Success for Kids With Asperger’s Syndrome.

Jacqueline S. Iseman, Ph.D., runs a private practice specializing in treating children and adolescents in Washington, DC. Her areas of expertise include working with children, adolescents, and families providing psychotherapy, consultations, and assessment.

Sue Jeweler, a retired teacher, spent her 30-year career working with children in the Washington, DC area. She is the coauthor of the best-selling Smart Kids With Learning Difficulties.

Friday, February 20, 2009

Sue Scheff - Troubled Teens

Are a parent dealing with a defiant, belligerent at risk teenager and you are at your wit’s end - It may be time to think about intervention. It is out of love that we seek to give our teens a second opportunity in life. If it is obvious they are escalating in a downward path, as a parent, it is our responsibility to find help. Whether it is seeking local therapy or support groups, or taking the major step of residential boarding schools - be a proactive parent.

If you are debating residential therapy for your teen, learn more about this extremely daunting and confusing industry.

Yes, you need to get help - but educate yourself first.

Learn more about Wit’s End at http://www.witsendbook.com/ and author Sue Scheff at http://www.suescheff.com/ -the response has been overwhelming!

If you are struggling with your teen today - pick up Wit’s End and learn more!

For a quick read, check out http://www.aparentstruestory.com/ - the foundation of Wit’s End!

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Source: Connect with Kids

“Hate, unfortunately – it’s a virus. There’s been racism, anti-Semitism. There’s been discrimination against people throughout the ages. The Internet just provides an instant tool and access to it.”

– Deborah Lauter, Anti-Defamation League

By some estimates, 70 million kids are logging onto the Internet every day, and many are viewing sites that are increasingly disturbing.

Jesse Granger, 15, says, “I’ve come across hate websites. There was one about the Ku Klux Klan, and it had a lot of pictures of recent parades and marches.”

Sixteen-year-old Quincy Kelly saw a web site that “was talking about how slaves should be happy that they got brought over to America from Africa.”

Deborah Lauter of the Anti-Defamation League has been monitoring these sites for years. “Hate, unfortunately – it’s a virus,” she says. “There’s been racism, anti-Semitism. There’s been discrimination against people throughout the ages. The Internet just provides an instant tool and access to it.”

It’s also a sophisticated tool, especially in terms of attracting young web surfers.

Lauter says, “Some of the [hate] websites actually have games for children. The websites are attractive visually. There are puzzles, word games – it’s pretty sick when you look at them.”

And kids don’t even have to be looking for them to inadvertently access them.

“A perfect example would be a student doing Internet research and they plug in something as simple as ‘Martin Luther King,’ which is a very typical one. And some of these racist websites will be accessed and a kid could go on and start researching and think what’s there is fact,” says Lauter.

That’s where parents come in, she says, to make sure their kids are aware.

“[Children] need to understand to look at things critically,” says Lauter. “They need to understand that not everything on the Internet or everything they read is the truth.”

And as kids become more sophisticated and Internet savvy, they will learn to weed out fiction from fact.

Matthew Burnett, 14, agrees. “If you use your common sense you can see through most of it,” he says.

And 15-year-olds Kelly Raines and Rebecca Turner say, “I think that if people are going to put that on, they’re going to put that on. And it’s just a matter of whether you take it, or like, just be like, ‘that’s stupid.’ I’m not going to worry about that.”

Tips for Parents

The Internet has opened the door to a wealth of information at our fingertips. But it has also brought instant accessibility to illegal drugs, pornography, hate websites and more. It’s important to set guidelines regarding your child’s Internet usage. Consider these important steps from the University of Oklahoma police department:

Learn about the Internet – If you are just starting out, see what information and classes are offered by your local library, community center, schools or newspaper.
Get Involved – Spend time online with your child -- at home, at the library or at a computer center in your community. Your involvement in your child's life includes his/her online life. Your participation and guidance is important to help ensure your child’s Internet safety.
Stay Informed – Learn about the latest parental control tools that can help you keep your child safe online. Stay abreast of what’s in the news about kids and web sites.
Become an Advocate for Kids – If you see online material or practices you do not like, contact your Internet Service Provider (the company that provides you with a connection to the Internet) or the company that created the material. Take advantage of this unique opportunity to help this growing medium develop in positive ways for kids.
According to SafeKids.com, there are steps you can take to help prevent your child from seeing inappropriate content on the Internet. Consider the following suggestions:

In an online public area such as a chat room or bulletin board, never give out identifying information, including name, home address, school name or telephone number.
In an email, do not give out identifying information unless you are certain you are giving it to someone both you and your child know and trust. Think carefully before revealing any personal information such as age, marital status or financial information. Consider using a pseudonym or unlisting your child's name if your service allows it.
Get to know the sites and services your child uses. If you don't know how to log on, have your child show you. Find out what types of information the services and websites offer, how trustworthy the information is and if parents can block objectionable material.
Never allow a child to arrange a face-to-face meeting with another computer user without parental permission.
Never respond to messages or bulletin board items that are suggestive, obscene, belligerent, threatening or make you feel uncomfortable. Encourage your children to tell you if they encounter such messages. If you or your child receives a message that is harassing or threatening, forward a copy of the message to your service provider and ask for their assistance.
Remember that people online may not be who they seem. Because you can't see or even hear people over the Internet, it is easy for them to misrepresent themselves. For example, someone who says he/she is an expert in a certain field may actually be a biased individual with an agenda or someone with harmful intentions.

Not everything you read online is true. Be wary of any offers that require you to come to a meeting or have someone visit your house. Also, research several different sources of information before referring to something you read on the Internet as “fact.”
Set reasonable rules and guidelines for computer use. Discuss these rules and post them near the computer as a reminder. Remember to monitor your kids’ compliance with these rules, especially when it comes to the amount of time your children spend on the computer. A child’s or teenager's excessive use of online services or bulletin boards, especially late at night, may indicate a potential problem. Remember that personal computers and online services should not be used as electronic babysitters.

Make computers a family activity. Consider keeping the computer in a family room rather than the child's bedroom. Get to know your children’s "online friends" just as you do their other friends.

References
Federal Bureau of Investigation
National Center for Health Statistics
SafeKids.com
Smart Parent
The Police Notebook
The University of Illinois

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Sue Scheff: ADHD and Drug Abuse

Source: Connect with Kids

“In a way that athletes have used steroids and other medications in the past to enhance their athletic performance, Adderall is actually being used to kind of pseudo-enhance their academic performance.”

– Heather Hayes, M.Ed., Counselor.

Nineteen-year-old Marisa McCorkle has been using Adderall for two years.

“I use it for various reasons,” she says, “like tests, it helps me on tests. [And it] helps me stay awake, and [with] studying.”

It sounds like a wonder drug. Adderall – an amphetamine commonly used to treat ADHD. But, studies show it’s being abused more and more.

“In a way that athletes have used steroids and other medications in the past to enhance their athletic performance, Adderall is actually being used to kind of pseudo-enhance their academic performance,” states Heather Hayes, a licensed professional counselor.

One of the biggest problems with using the drug recreationally is that most teens are unaware of its dangers.

Twenty-year-old “Dave,” a college student, says, “I think it’s pretty safe unless you’re taking five at a time.”

But experts say even in small doses, the dangers of taking Adderall can range from headaches, increased heart rate and insomnia to things far worse.

“Any amphetamine has the potential to give someone an amphetamine psychosis,” warns Hayes. “So when you take a lot of amphetamines and you’re not sleeping, then you will literally hallucinate. … [You] will absolutely leave reality and become delusional and paranoid.”

Hayes says parents need to make the dangers of taking Adderall clear to teens. Otherwise, they may continue to believe it’s a cheap and easily available drug that helps them study. Marisa and Dave are examples of students with this belief.

“I get it for free, but I know people who will give … maybe two to five dollars [per pill],” says Marisa.

“Actually, I’m gonna go to my doctor and, uh, try to get a prescription next semester,” says Dave, “’cause I think it’s a really effective way to get good grades. I wouldn’t think it was that hard to, uh, fake having ADD.”

But others say Adderall fools you – that it only seems like it’s helping kids study. Amanda Mattison, 17, has seen first-hand what can happen.

“[Students taking Adderall] can focus when they’re taking it, and they study and they cram for five or six hours and they’re good-to-go for the exam,” she says, “but by the time the exam rolls around, they’re either too worn out or … it’s lost it’s effect.”

“Bottom line,” says Hayes, “Adderall is as dangerous of a drug when unsupervised as any other medication. It’s addictive and it is dangerous.”



Tips for Parents

Adderall, manufactured by Shire Pharmaceuticals Group of the United Kingdom, is a stimulant prescribed for attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, or ADHD. Shire states, “Adderall isn't intended to enhance test scores and should only be used under medical supervision.”

Adderall is a fast-acting mixture of amphetamines. Amphetamines act on the brain by mimicking the neurotransmitter dopamine, which increases alertness and concentration. Studies conducted by the National Institutes of Health in the late 1970s found that low-dose stimulants increase concentration and alertness in everyone, not just people with attention disorders. Here are some things to know about ADHD:

ADHD is a medical condition linked to a chemical imbalance in the brain. Doctors believe it stems from biological, not environmental, conditions.

Generally, people with ADHD have trouble focusing on tasks or subjects, and they may act impulsively and often get in trouble.

Approximately 3 to 7 percent of school-age children and 4 percent of adults suffer from ADHD.
Adderall is one of a handful of stimulants prescribed for ADHD.

Side effects of Adderall can include loss of appetite, insomnia and weight loss.

During late-night study marathons, students from grade school to med school have long relied on stimulants– which include everything from caffeine to cocaine. But with Adderall, and other similar prescription drugs, some high school and college students are hoping to improve scores on standardized (and even classroom) tests. Other students are turning to alternative medicine, such as hypnosis or herbal supplements, for an extra edge.

The concern with Adderall is not from a single use. One pill won’t kill you. But one pill is likely to lead to a second pill, then a third and a subsequent snowball effect where physical damage can occur. Also, Adderall is relatively easy to obtain. Overall, prescriptions for stimulants have risen from 1.6 million in 2000 to 2.6 million a month in 2004. Adderall XR, a once-a-day, extended-release form of the drug, is the leader in its class, capturing about a third of the market. Consider the following:

Prescription drug use was once rare, but it has now crossed into the mainstream.
Prescriptive amphetamines have figured prominently in calls to emergency departments and poison control centers.

Kids, and even their parents, are desperate for any available academic edge and willing to go to the extreme to obtain it.

Some students feel extra pressure because they feel they are not just failing themselves, but also failing their parents and other family members.

The College Board, the nonprofit administrator of the SAT, has no rules explicitly prohibiting drug use. Spokeswoman Chiara Coletti says, "We certainly do not recommend that students take any drugs or stimulants in hopes of affecting their scores."

Some kids taking Adderall have valid prescriptions, but not all. Under federal law, it's illegal to knowingly possess a "schedule II" drug (like Adderall) without a prescription. But prosecutions for possession are rare.

Many schools would suspend or expel a student caught using marijuana or other street drugs but might not punish students taking prescription drugs to help with test taking.

References
ADHD Support and Resources from Eli Lily
National Institutes of Health
Nature Magazine
Shire Pharmaceuticals Group
TeensHealth
The Wall Street Journal

Monday, January 19, 2009

Sue Scheff: NextGen Parenting


Kids nowadays are different from the previous generation. They have mobile phones with textbooks stored inside, with computers and laptops that connects to Facebook and YouTube. Some even begin to make money faster than their parents.


Apart from that, they are smarter, most probably caused by the food they eat, or even their surrounding.


At present, this is Generation X, Y and Z, or simply said, the new Millenials.So as a parent, the challenges to educate and teach them is very different from they way our parents educate and teach us.


NextGen Parenting is founded for that purpose.


NextGen Parenting is going to launch on 1 January 2009 and currently are looking for volunteers to blog and contribute articles and content to the site.


Contributions in any way are welcome. If you are interested to volunteer to the cause bringing up the next generation more effectively, email vince@nextgenparenting.com and joann@nextgenparenting.com

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Sue Scheff: HIV Testing and Teens


Years ago, one of our biggest fears with pre-marital sex, was getting pregnant! Today we still have that fear, but what is more concerning is the STD’s! They can be death sentences in some cases. Parents need to take the time to educate our teens today of the consequences of unprotected sex. None of us like the idea of our teens having sex so young, but we need to face the reality if they do, they need to be protected.

Source: Connect with Kids

“Our evidence is that when people find out they’re infected with HIV, they cut down their risky behavior by more than two-thirds.”

– Bernard Branson, M.D., Division of HIV/AIDS Prevention, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention

Does your 13-year-old need an HIV test?

“No, because she’s not sexually active,” says father Mark Alterio, “So I wouldn’t have her screened.”

“I’m a proponent of being more informed,” says mother Ingrid Emmons, “and I feel like if you’re more informed then we can get you the help that you need. So I’d rather know than not know.”

The American College of Physicians is now backing the Center for Disease Control’s recommendations to have everyone between the ages of 13 and 64 tested for HIV.

But why start so young?

“Our information, first of all, from recent surveys suggests that about 47-percent of teenagers, high school students, are sexually active,” says Dr. Bernard Branson, with the CDC’s division of HIV/AIDS Prevention.

According to the Centers for Disease Control, 250-thousand Americans have HIV and don’t know it.

Experts say expanded testing could stop thousands from spreading the virus.

“Our evidence is that when people find out they’re infected with HIV,” says Dr. Branson, “they cut down their risky behavior by more than two-thirds.”

Experts estimate testing will reduce the number of new HIV cases from around 40-thousand to 17-thousand a year.

Screening could especially benefit teenagers.

“Our recommendation is to make this something that’s routine,” says Dr. Branson, “so that it doesn’t cause an adolescent in particular to have to admit something they might prefer not to, in order to get HIV-tested.”

In other words, if it’s not routine, some kids won’t ask to get tested - because it means admitting they were sexually active.

Some parents agree.

“Kids are always hiding something,” says mother Melanie Zentner, “especially in the teenaged years, even if you’re close. So I’d like to know, so you can take care of it right away. That would be my opinion.”

HIV tests cost between eight and 20 dollars each. If there is a positive result, more testing is done to confirm the results.


Tips for Parents
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), in 2006, 15 percent of persons diagnosed with HIV/AIDS were 13 to 24. Twenty-six percent were aged 25-34. The typical delay between the exposure to HIV infection and the onset of AIDS means that most of these young adults were infected as teens. There is a growing concern among U.S. health organizations about complacency – referred to as “safe-sex fatigue” – among young people toward HIV infection and AIDS. However, statistics show there is no reason for teens to be complacent about AIDS.

The Kaiser Family FoundationSexual Health of Adolescents and Young Adults in the United States 2008 report finds the following statistics about HIV, AIDS and teens:

The CDC estimates that almost 46,000 young people, ages 13 to 24, were living with HIV in the U.S in 2006. Women comprised 28% of these HIV/AIDS cases among 13- to 24-year-olds.
African-American young adults are disproportionately affected by HIV infection, accounting for 60% of HIV/AIDS diagnoses in 13- to 24-year-olds in 2006.
More HIV infections occurred among adolescents and young adults 13–29 years old (34%) of new HIV infections than any other age group. Most young people with HIV/AIDS were infected by sexual transmission.
In 2006, 16% of young adults ages 18 to 24 reported that they had been tested for HIV in the past 12 months.
The Kaiser study also shows that over the past decade teens have become smarter about sex:

Nearly half (48%) of all high school students in 2007 reported ever having had sexual intercourse, a decline from 54% in 1991. Males (50%) are slightly more likely than females (46%) to report having had sex. The median age at first intercourse is 16.9 years for boys and 17.4 years for girls.
In 2007, among the 35% of currently sexually active high school students, 62% reported using a condom the last time they had sexual intercourse, up from 57% in 1997.1 African-American students (67%) were more likely to report using condoms compared to White (60%) and Hispanic (61%) students. Males (69%) were more like to report condom use than females (55%).
Using a dual method of a condom and hormonal contraceptive is becoming more prevalent for teenage females. The percentage of currently sexually active never-married females 15–19 years of age reporting use of dual methods rose from 8% in 1995 to 20% in 2002.
Sexually active teens need information, skills and support to protect themselves from HIV and AIDS. The American Association for World Health (AAWH) says parents communicating in a positive way about sexuality and risky behaviors can have a “profound influence” in helping young people make healthy decisions. Talking to your teen about AIDS can often be difficult and uncomfortable because it requires talking about issues like sex and drugs. The AAWH suggests the following tips when talking to your teen about HIV and AIDS:

AIDS stands for acquired immunodeficiency syndrome. It is a serious and fatal disease of the human immune system and is caused by a virus called human immunodeficiency virus (HIV). A person will not develop AIDS unless he or she has first been infected with HIV.
HIV can be spread through oral, anal or vaginal sexual activity. The sexual transmission can be from male to female, from male to male, from female to male or from female to female. HIV may be in an infected person’s blood, semen, vaginal secretions or breast milk. It can enter the body through cuts or sores on tissue in the vagina, penis, rectum and sometimes the mouth. The cuts may be so small that you don’t know they’re there.
You can become infected with HIV from even one instance of unprotected sex. While complete abstinence is the surest way to prevent the sexual transmission of HIV, protecting yourself with a latex condom or barrier at every sexual encounter is very important.
Most birth control methods like the pill or diaphragms don’t protect you from HIV.
Whether you inject drugs or steroids or use needles for tattoos or body piercing, sharing needles places you at risk for becoming infected with HIV.
Using drugs of any kind, including alcohol or inhalants, can cloud your judgment. You could become less careful about having sex or injecting drugs – behaviors that place you at risk for HIV.

References
American Association for World Health
American College of Physicians
Centers for Disease Control
The Kaiser Family Foundation

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Sue Scheff: (Teen) Inflated Self Esteem




“Just be happy about yourself, feel confident in what you can do.”

– Tyler, age 17

Self-esteem is important. “Well of course!” agrees 16-year-old Annie.

“The lower self-esteem you have the more people can pick on you, the more people can mess around and make jokes about you, that’s just how it is nowadays,” explains 17-year-old Tyler.

Researchers from San Diego State University studied annual surveys given to high school seniors since 1975. They found that self-esteem among teens is at its highest level ever.

One example: 65 percent felt confident that they would be successful at their job, compared to just 49 percent back in 1975.

Experts point to the trend in the late 70s, where parents and teachers used praise to boost self-esteem … sometimes instead of kids actually earning praise and recognition.

“To feel good about ourselves, we need things to feel good about,” says Dr. Frank Phajares, Clinical Psychologist. “We need accomplishments, we need mastery experiences, we need real competencies. And when we succeed, that’s when we feel good about ourselves.”

Studies show that earned self-esteem is powerful: kids tend to perform better when they feel good about themselves and are better able to get through disappointments and difficulties in life.

But, experts warn, praise without accomplishment is risky.

“If we just focus on making kids feel good and liking themselves, then I think we are missing the boat and I think we are raising little tyrants who are self-centered, selfish and could disregard other people.”

Tips for Parents


A general increase in the self-esteem of American children is good news, right? Researchers at San Diego State University aren’t so sure. Their study of adolescents and college students from the 1970s to 2000s does show an overall increase in self-esteem, but suggests that the increase is not due to improvements in children’s behavior. Instead, the increase could be the result of educators and parents urging children to feel better about themselves. “The larger social environment is affecting self-esteem, rather than vice versa,” the study’s authors conclude. “The culture we create has an impact on our children’s feelings about themselves.”

Why is self-esteem important in children? According to the National Network for Child Care (NNCC), how children feel about themselves affects the way they act. Most of the time, children with high self-esteem will:

Make friends easily.
Show enthusiasm for new activities.
Be cooperative and follow age-appropriate rules.
Control their behavior.
Play by themselves and with other children.
Like to be creative and have their own ideas.
Be happy, full of energy, and talk to others without much encouragement.
What can you do to help children build high self-esteem? The NNCC offers the following suggestions:

Praise each child's successes (even very small ones). Praise each child who tries hard.
Give sincere affection. Let children know that they are loved and wanted.
Show interest in each child's activities, projects, or problems.
Tell children what to do instead of what not to do. This prepares them for what to do.
Instead of: "Don't throw the ball," say: "Roll the ball on the floor." Instead of: "Don't squeeze the kitten," say: "Hold the kitten gently."
Let children know that mistakes are a natural part of growing up. Everyone (including adults) makes mistakes.
Try to ignore temper tantrums and other negative behavior as much as possible.
Show appreciation when children cooperate, help you, say kind things to other children, obey the rules, and do other positive things.
Remember that learning new skills takes time and practice. Children do not learn new skills all at once.
Respond affectionately when children behave well. Tell children what you like about their behavior.
Let children know that you believe in them and expect them to do well.

References
Personality and Social Psychology Review
National Network for Child Care

Sunday, January 4, 2009

Sue Scheff 2009 Parenting Teens Online for their Future


As a parent advocate, I encourage parents to learn more about online safety. A great place to start is Reputation Defender! Remember, your child may be a "child" today, but soon they will be applying to college and filling out employment applications. Will their online profile be acceptable?


Take a moment to learn more!



MyChild by ReputationDefender scours the Internet for all references to your child or teen - by name, photography, screen name, or social network profiles - and packages it to you in an easy-to-understand report. Worried about bullies? Concerned that your teens' friends and peers are posting inappropriate materials online? MyChild searches every corner of the Internet for traces of your kids. If you want to help your teen manage their online reputation, but have felt powerless to do so, ReputationDefender is your answer!